At the waiting room of Quest Diagnostics testing center, Greenpoint, Brooklyn, an incredibly frazzled-looking blond Polish woman in green scrubs came out to check the sign-in list (no employee had entered the waiting room for 15 full minutes). A very young woman went up to her.
‘I just scratched my name out,’ said the young woman. ‘I will come back another day.’
‘Ok,’ said the worker, studying the clipboard.
‘See?’ said the young woman. ‘Right there. I scratched it out. Because I have to pick up my kid – at 10:30, the schools let out.’
‘Ok,’ said the worker.
‘So,’ said the young woman. ‘I suppose I will come back tomorrow. Because how many are waiting?’
The worker made a vague motion over her shoulder at the waiting room, where sat a very old man with a cane, a Mom-ish looking woman reading a Polish magazine, me, and a mentally-challenged man (who had clearly shit himself) playing with a pop-bead toy and accompanied by an older lady with garish rouge circles painted on her cheeks.
‘So…four?’ asked the young woman.
‘Yeah, four, yeah,’ said the worker. The very old man approached.
‘When will you call me?’ he asked.
‘Well, I will have to come back tomorrow, then,’ said the young woman. ‘What are your hours?’
‘Who are you?’ said the worker.
‘Douglas,’ said the old man, pointing. ‘When will you call?’
‘Now,’ said the worker. ‘Room one.’
‘Room what? Where?’
‘Your hours tomorrow?’
‘Uh…eight to five. Room one, room one. Right there, sir. Elizabeth?’
I went up with my form.
‘Okay,’ said the young woman, regretfully. ‘I guess I will just come back tomorrow then.’
‘I can’t do this test,’ said the worker, looking at my form. ‘For a job, yes? I can’t do. Will speak to my friend to do. Please take a seat.’
I sat down again. The young woman left in a huff, and the worker guided the old man to Room One.
Presently, another harried Polish woman came out, this one in white scrubs. She looked at the clipboard and called to the back:
‘Which one had the form?’
‘What?’ called the first worker from another room.
‘The form? Which is the one with the form?’
Everyone in the waiting room stood up halfway.
‘Me!’ I said, coming up with my form.
She took it, and scrutinized me.
‘Are you ready to urinate now?’ she asked, loudly.
‘I sure am!’ I announced.
