- Unplug all of my appliances when I leave the house;
- Find a drugstore that sells those curly lightbulbs, and then spend the money on them;
- Turn the water off while I’m brushing my teeth;
- Buy canvas bags to take to the grocery store, and then use those bags when I go to the grocery store;
- Buy local, and/or go vegetarian (except by accident), and/or spend $2 more on the organic variety;
- Not leave the coffeepot and the laptop running all day long;
- Read any books that are primarily about green living, carbon footprints, and/or responsible consuming, or listen to people, whether they are on NPR, or not, yammer on and on endlessly about all the various things they are or are not buying and eating this week;
- Change my spending habits at all;
- Write a letter to any legislator;
- Unplug even one appliance when I leave the house;
- Wash my clothes in cold water, or line-dry them;
- Change any of my habits at all;
- Reuse anything at all that I would normally just throw out;
- Put any thought whatsoever into saving the environment; or
- Really, in all honesty, one single thing that I’m not already doing.
Six Things That I Am Willing to Do to Save the Environment:
- Not use the car, or the dishwasher that I already do not possess and can’t afford;
- Arbitrarily throw things away in multiple trashcans, and call it recycling;
- Watch An Inconvenient Truth (once);
- Not be in control of my own heat;
- Comply with any tax or regulation that I am powerless to avoid; and
- Lecture others.
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